Overwhelmed and Unorganised

Do you ever find yourself completely overwhelmed by your life? A to do list as long as your arm and everyone wanting a piece of you?

Oh ok. Not just me then!

I am feeling very overwhelmed at the moment. I’m struggling to see the light at the end of the tunnel.

There is the mess that is my house. The constant struggle to keep everything in its place. The older I’ve got the more mess has bothered me (who knew!) and whilst I was a fairly messy 20/30-year-old, it just doesn’t work for me anymore. I can’t bear it. However, I’m so bloody tired all the time, I can’t seem to keep on top of it either! Hubby is home the most and whilst he can be very good at some things, he obviously doesn’t have the same priority list as I do. He’ll let the kitchen get cluttered and dirty and it just won’t bother him. He empties Pickle’s school bag of 10 pictures a day, a few school letters and leave them on the dining table. “I don’t have time” will be his cry. Well neither do I!

The kid’s bedrooms look like a bomb have hit them and it’s got so bad I just don’t know where to start to be honest. All the Christmas and Birthday presents haven’t got “homes” yet and I just need to sit in the room and work it all out. I don’t have the time to do that though. Our bedroom is just AWFUL. Not only have we been unable to afford a carpet in there, but I’ve run out of storage space for shoes and boots and no space for all my cardigans. They are now piling up on the floor. Even my makeup draw has become unmanageable.  My storage box (with towels in it) next to my bed has filled up on top with books upon books, cards, tablets etc… ARghhhhhh.

My bedroom disaster

My bedroom disaster

It took me over a year to work out what to do in our hallway. Then when I started looking for the right cupboard, it took 6 mths of going backwards and forwards to work out which is right and what we could afford. I finally made the decision in November, ordered it and am on a 3 mth waiting list for the bloody thing to arrive. I’ve forgotten what it looks like now. I’ll find out at the end of March though. 🙂

We’ve also been trying to rejig our living space downstairs. We have an open plan space that incorporates the living room at the front, the original dining room and an extension at the back. It’s a big old space and we just didn’t feel we were using it properly. We’ve now moved the kids play area to the extension alongside the kitchen but want to put our old sofa down there too. We can’t afford a new sofa to put in its place though and we need an arc lamp or similar for where we’ve now put the dining table as it’s so dark. More stuff to think about.

Work has also been a big issue for me. I still only work 30 hours a week across 4 days, still have that rather stressful commute of nursery, school then work and all in reverse at the end of the day. I am currently doing my same project management job but with the added responsibility of managing 2 other PM’s and scheduling all the work. An explosion of new projects seems to have coincided with my appointment in a role that previously wasn’t taken. It’s as if my boss knew this was going to happen and didn’t want to do it herself. It’s stressful. It’s messy. I’m moving projects off people, to shift to others and being chased by Senior Managers and Salesman over who’s doing what. Can’t move stuff until other stuff moves…..to be honest, it’s all a bit of a nightmare.

With of all of this comes my seasonal stress about my neighbours. They are very noisy, love playing music. Love having parties. Last year they built a “cabin” at the end of the garden for one of the teenager’s drum kits and the dad of the house has spent quite a few days and evenings in there with his annoying music up quite loud. Pink Floyd and other 80’s shite! I can sense that my time in the garden will be limited in the summer. I hate feeling like this. Would like to be able to enjoy my garden.

Then there is the constant children’s birthday parties, juggling of appointments, hubby’s work, childcare, occasional social life, visitors or visiting people, dentist, doctors, school appointments.

What’s the solution? How do I find a way out? Any suggestions on any of my issues would be appreciated as I’m so overwhelmed I could cry.


About freefallinginto40

I am 40 years old. I blog about how I'm coping with my "new" age at www.freefallinginto.com . I'm a married mother to two after years of infertility. I have a 6 year old called Pickle and a 3 year old called The Monster. I work 4 days a week. We are also planning a move to the country! I blog about that at www.ourmovetothecountry.wordpress.com
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20 Responses to Overwhelmed and Unorganised

  1. i hear you, i so bloody hear you…unfortunately i have no solutions right now, but will keep checking to see if anyone else puts any in their comments here!! but if it helps i just keep telling myself that we are clean, fed and happy…even if the house isn’t!!!!

  2. swhittle says:

    I hear you – between work and school and other commitments I frequently feel overwhelmed and I can’t tolerate mess. Luckily perhaps I don’t have an OH to mess up the house, it’s just me and Flea. Here’s what I suggest. You don’t have three days to organise your whole house and you can’t afford new storage necessarily – so abandon the idea of a BIG clearout where everything gets done in one go.

    Instead, accept what you can do with the time you have. I find lots of clutter is stuff we don’t actually need. So every quarter (or so) I pop one of those big plastic storage buckets from B&Q in the hallway, one outside the bathroom, and another by the washing machine. Every time I walk past a toy/book/DVD/bottle of shampoo we don’t use, or a piece of clothing that Flea’s grown out of, I pick it up and drop it in the bucket. After a week or so, I dump the buckets in the car and make a trip to the charity shop, and the tip.

    With the unnecessary clutter removed, it’s a lot easier to make sense of what you do have and where it might go. I think choosing one room and blitzing it for an hour can make a huge difference – and you DO have time, if you think about the hour you’d otherwise spend watching TV or reading blogs. Get the little people in the house involved – Flea does the vacuuming and dusting in our house!

    In terms of inexpensive storage, those foldable boxes and baskets from Ikea are a godsend – I don’t have enough room in my drawers for lots of of my sweaters and jeans, so I keep them folded in baskets under the bed. For Flea, I love the plastic boxes on wheels from Ikea – we can chuck loads of things in there and keep them against the walls in the playroom, and I also invested in lots of small baskets from a local shop, and I have those on bookshelves, and use them for different small toys – we have a basket for action figures, a basket for Moshi Monster figures, a basket for pens and pencils and so on. I also have those pop-up bins from Ikea for her soft toys, which she seems to need by the hundred. Once the little baskets are on the shelves the room looks all pretty and organised – don’t be afraid to throw away boxes and packaging to make toys easier to store – for example, we never keep 3DS game boxes – they all get binned and we have a small basket where all the games live and take up next to no room.

    Hope that helps!

    • Oh it really does, thanks Sally. The tub outside rooms is a brilliant idea. I’m definitely going to do that. I think a trip to Ikea might be in order. I’ve copied and pasted your comment into my notepad. Thanks.

  3. Anne says:

    Oh my, it all sounds dreadful but trust me you are not alone. I’m thinking most people get into this place sometimes. When I feel like this I write it all down, make a list, prioritise what I can and can’t sort and in what order I can get things done. Then as you cross each thing off it makes you feel so much better. Even if you don’t achieve everything or have the answers to everything just a few things in order can make you feel like you are re-gaining control. Good luck x

  4. pinkoddy says:

    Wish I had some great advice but I don’t 😦
    I hear you – especially in regards to parties, there’s at least one every week!
    Just keep trying to enjoy life and not let it bog you down.

  5. Sonya Cisco says:

    Oh my bedroom is a disaster. Our wardrobe broke a year ago, and my clothes live in piles on the floor, I don’t even have a chest of drawers! We seriously need to buy some furniture, as when I try to tidy up there is no where to put things away. Drives me to distraction!
    I think this time of year is exhausting. I have no energy, but I know I will feel brighter once the weather warms up a bit.

  6. Autism Mom Praying In The Storm says:

    Our minister said, “If you don’t use it, someone else could”. I think you have to keep ahead of all the stuff coming in and get rid of quickly those things that are meaningless, and prioritize things that are important for today. It seems like the people who simplify their lives are the happiest. Not the ones with the most stuff. Best Wishes and God Bless.

  7. Google IKEA expedit. It’s a marvel for kids toys, shove the mess in boxes and you will never see it.

    That and lists. And getting your husband onboard to help. Point out if he waits until you have a nervous breakdown he will have even more to do.

  8. Hello darling, please don’t worry, we’re all there too! As others have said Ikea is your friend. Mass produced and easy to spot it may be, but it is also cheap, well made and incredibly versatile. We have Trofast frames and storage tubs that have housed plastic c**p from the word go, now they have stationary supplies and craft things in. In our bedroom we have an Expedit unit that was a display/room divider in the sitting room of our previous flat – just bought a load of baskets and it’s now our chest of drawers.

    Definitely define your ‘child’ areas – since my eldest was born 12 years ago I have had a sitting room/area that is MINE come the evening – with pictures, candles etc where you can relax with a glass of wine and not see any clutter. The toys, dinner debris, general detritus of the day get shoved elsewhere (in one of the numerous baskets I have around/under things). Being stared down by a Little Tikes kitchen at 9pm whilst watching The Good Wife is my idea of hell.

    So to sum up, Ikea and wine. #thatisall 😉

  9. Notmyyearoff says:

    We have this!!! I have no idea how people organise themselves and stay on top of everything. Our spare room is piled high with laundry that I keep meaning to put away. I’m supposed to be doing it all today and I haven’t done much yet!

  10. Grenglish says:

    Same same same! I do feel like there are never enough hours in the day but the time I do have to do these things – after work and after Z has gone to bed, is when I am most knackered and just want to crash on the sofa in front of eastenders.
    Similar to Sally’s idea of the big tubs, I have a big selfridges bag for stuff that needs to go up into the loft – so socks, pants, clothes that Z grows out of go straight in there. When it is full, it goes up in the loft. We also have little baskets on bookshelves – one has plastic food in it, another is for cars, one for animals and one for a teaset bits and pieces. Then two big plastic boxes in playroom that I just chuck all the toys in at the end of the day.
    As for the house, well EVERYTHING needs doing but we just can’t afford it at the moment so I have stopped thinking about it for now. The wallpaper in our hallway started peeling last week so we have stuck it back on with bluetack.
    Yes, really. My 20-something self would not recognise me 🙂

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